Beauty & The Beast

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Hello people! Time check...11:30 pm on the dot. I haven't been updating my blog for the past 2 days cuz of my usual never ending assignments and also cuz I'm damn shagged the moment I arrive home from school to the extend that all I can think of when I step through my doorstep is to eat my dinner, shower, finish up my assignments for the day and go to bed.

Anyway, 3 more weeks to Crit Week. 4 more weeks to the Common Foundation Party!!! I'm trying out for the host, I'm gonna be performing and I'll also be dancing my ass off on the dancefloor. I wanted to be the DJ too but Iain put his foot down, telling me that I can either be the host or the DJ. I surrendered the DJ-ing job to Qom and decided to try out for the host.

Why am I so eager to do everything? Cuz it's the end of Common Foundation, after which all of us will be breaking up into our respective courses. I will miss my close friends. :(

I just can't wait for school to be officially over. I can look for a new job at Jun's old working place at Coffee Bean, Century Square.

P.S: Shagged but bearing.

11:30 PM

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Hey. If you're reading this, I just wanna take this opportunity to apologise to you for what went down between us last night. Jyeah. We fought and fought continuously and eventually, settled everything over the phone but that still doesn't stop me from feeling extremely guilty until now. Jyeah, I know. You told me to quit thinking too much and to just drop the matter and believe me, I am trying my hardest to forget about everything and to just carry on with how we usually are, being the usual wacko duo (haha! I can still remember that particular time when you gave me a shock and I jumped out of my skin! God! You couldn't stop laughing!) but like I mentioned earlier on, I can't stop feeling guilty, knowing its my fault that we started fighting in the first place.

I'm sick of my temper. I'm sick of my irrational behaviour and my tendency to follow my emotions when I get so worked up or pissed off. I'm sick and tired of clashing with you cuz hell! I love you tremendously and I can't bear to lose you as a friend, as a younger brother. I don't wanna be that 2006 Balminas Dzulkarnain nor do I want history to repeat itself. I wanna be a brand new better me. One who is understanding, caring and loving and good-hearted, just like how you wanted if you were to have your own blood older brother. Sadly, I don't see myself as understanding, caring, loving or good-hearted but trust me when I said that I'm doing my very best.

You know what? Lets just screw it! What's past is past. Let bygones be bygones. We're still brothers, we're still damn close like before. No difference, other than the fact that we know each other much better now. Agreed bro? :D

P.S: I love you bro. :D

9:19 AM

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Ok. The final project for FDS has been released and its Interior Design Style. Wow! This is so gonna be tough and we've got to complete it in like what? 3 weeks time! The pressure is on baby!

Halo by Nicole Scherzinger

Hope you can forgive me for all the mistakes I've made
I'm sorry I couldn't wear your halo
I'm sorry I couldn't be perfect

P.S: Halo

7:33 PM

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Ok. The weekend has come and gone again. Now it's like 1.40 am and I can't sleep at all. Thinking too much is the particular reason.

Anyways, I spend almost my entire Saturday completing my assignments(except for GC). Sunday was an R & R day for me. I was like kicking back, downloading shit, spending time with my beloved brother, Afiq, and watching Honey on my laptop while others were busy doing their assignments. :D

Ok. That was pretty evil and nasty of me but accept the facts cuz I'm stating the truth peeps.

You know? Somtimes, I feel that you deserve better than me. I mean, look at me now and look at my tainted past. How on earth did you put up with me all this while? I can never be perfect or as perfect as I can get. Yeah, you did tell me that no one and nothing can be perfect. Maybe I'm expecting too much of myself?

P.S: You deserve better

1:38 AM

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Ok. So I just got back from Shaz's pit like an hour and a half ago. It was ok except for the fact that her family members loved to cam whore and I wasn't really in the mood to take pictures today.

Anyways, I spent my entire morning, afternoon and early evening finishing up my assignments. Now, I only have to touch up my full color tessellation for FDS before I can finally take my well deserved break tomorrow!

Damn! I so need a break man. Jyeah. Most of my assignments are completed but I so need a long break from school. 1 more month yaw! Hang in there baby!

P.S: 1 more month to a sweet long break

11:14 PM

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BDC submission is finally over! Started nude drawing today. Everything is ok except for the fact that I tend to draw out of proportion at times. My drawing skills is improving though. :D

Anyways, I'm only left with my major assignments nowadays, being FDS, VAS and GC. The assignments for the other modules have all been completed. Yay me!

Hmm. Something just crossed my mind but it slipped out almost an instant later. Forgot what I wanted to type out. Nevermind then. -.-

Ohya! Now I remember. I wanna audition to become the host/Emcee for the CF Party, I wanna audition to perform, I wanna try and be a DJ for that party and I also wanna dance my ass off on that day. All in 1 party. Cool or what? Hahaha!

P.S: Wish me luck people. :D

9:51 PM

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I just installed Photoshop and Illustrator on my brand new ACER Aspire 4736G. Now I can mess around with stuff and get started on my GC assignment! YAY!

Ok2. Nerd talk. Fast forwarddddddd!

Today, surprisingly, school was fun. Concentrated really hard on my monochrome tessellation painting and the result for now(it's halfway completed) is amazing. Wow! The things I can really accomplish if I put my mind to it and expel all those distractions!

*Lovelies Clique: Sorry for not mingling around much with you peeps today but I wanna focus on my schoolwork from now on as I don't wanna fail or retake any modules. I still love you though. :D*

*Saiful: Bro. Don't ever think that I've forgotten you guys ok. I know it's been a really long time since I hung out with you and the S.C gang but for starters, I've been extremely busy this past few weeks and secondly, I don't even know when you guys are free. I'll text you once I'm free to meet you guys aitz? Miss you bro and love you too! Love the S.C gang too yaw!

P.S: :D

9:56 PM

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What's ironic? The fact that I've got 4 sticks with me currently and 1 more pack of cigarettes at home but I've got NO lighter with me. So what do you do when you're caught in this situation? Go smoke-FREE for a day. That's right! This is coming from a heavy smoker like me.

I so wanna quit smoking cuz it's such a waste of money. If I'm still working, I don't mind but right now, I'm jobless, school's getting expensive due to the fact that I have to buy new school stuff like almost every week and I have my own expenses to handle.

Once most of my major assignments are done, I wanna apply at Coffee Bean at Century Square, Jun's former working place. :D

P.S: Optimism.

2:54 PM

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I hate you Dad. I really really do. You don't even know anything at all and yet, you chose to blame me any-o-how. Right. Call yourself a FORMER POLY STUDENT. If I had really NOT attended BDC for the whole school semester, SP would have sent a letter to YOU, saying that I've been EXPELLED from that module you sickening dumbshit! So don't go accusing me falsely.

Oh. And 1 more thing. If you're pissed with me, tell me straight to my face, like what you used to tell me before. Don't vent out your frustrations on Grandma and accuse her of giving me too much face. FUCK YOU! You can't even look after your own fucking skin and you even rely on Grandma to look after your bloody parrots every single day and you don't even give a damn about me so don't you dare accuse her you bloody ass!

If you're not happy with me being your fucking son, change the bloody birth certificate then!

P.S: I hate you Dad. I hate you to the core.

8:31 PM

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Ok. I have no idea what's with blogger but when I'm typing in my post for the day, all my entries are squeezed in the bottom left hand corner of the screen and worst, I can't even bolden or color the font.

Anyways, I was supposed to chill at Zakk's place today along with the usual gang but sadly, I didn't cuz firstly, I was laden with so much school assignments, which I neglected due to the chalet, that I had to get started today, secondly, I was still damn shagged from yesterday's chalet and thirdly, I was coaching my younger brother in his Chemistry, as his O Levels are coming up soon.

Oh ya! Speaking of yesterday, SP sent a letter to my dad at my address, saying that my attendance for BDC is below 85%. Boy! Did I get screwed by my dad! Fuck man...

P.S: So much assignments.

10:19 PM

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Hey y'all. Sorry for not updating but I was away for the past few days. Where? FCX chalet of course.

I won't get into exquisite details and stuff cuz it will be really wordy but all I can say was the chalet was freaking awesome! We were drinking for 2 consecutive nights. On the second night, almost all of us got drunk, including myself and my adek. I love the feeling of getting the drunk but I hate the hangovers that comes with it. -.-

A lot of funny things happened on the second night when we were high, tipsy and drunk. Like I said, I won't elaborate but my adek was actually comical, sweet and damn MANJE when he got drunk. Come to think of it, this was the first time that he actually got drunk after all this time that he's been drinking.

Ok. Maybe I'll spare this one little bit of detail cuz I want it to be etched in my blog for my past memories. I helped him on the mattress and that was when he was like laughing and hi-fiving and saying goodbye to everyone.

Me: Adek ok tk?

Adek: Ok. Da muntah, da tk mabok.

*Starts talking and mumbling.

Me: Da. Adek jge dri and adek g tdo. I love you.

Adek: Ok buhbye!

*Continues mumbling and talking

Me: Adek! Adek sygkn abg tk?

Adek: Sygkn ar!

Me: Lao adek sygkn abg, adek g tdo. Tkmu byk bunyi.

Adek: Ok. Abg...Can I have a hug first?

Me: Hug? Ahkay2...

Since my adek was drunk, I just relented cuz I love paying attention to drunkards as they will say the most funniest of things that they won't even say or do when they are sober. I hugged him, messed with his hair and told him "Go and sleep la dumbshit. Anything panggil abg cuz I'll be outside. I love you dek" to which he replied "Ok. Love you too bro" and he went off to bed.

P.S: Drunkards are funny. :D

12:43 PM

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Guess what? I ain't your freaking anger outlet or your bloody dog ok?! I didn't beg and plead with you to become your dog nor did you pay me to become one so please, wake up and face the reality.

Just because you're pissed off with Aiman and HER doesn't mean that you can just vent out your anger and frustrations on me like I'm some kinda filthy animal to you or something. And jyeah. Your last sentence in the text yesterday you sent me really drove me up the wall. You're not forcing me to forgive you?!! What is that supposed to mean? You sound really damn sarcastic simply by saying that sentence you know that??!

URGH! You know what? Nevermind. I shall just shut the fuck up for now.

P.S: I ain't NO ONE'S DOG arse.

9:54 AM

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It's only the first school-free day and already, I'm dying of boredom. No people to like create havoc or be chaotic with. No lecturers to ask for guidance regarding my assignments. Hour after hour I'm like sitting flat on my ass, wasting my freaking time surfing the Net or else, messing around with my cell.

Assignments tasklist:

~~OC (Individual Ppt Presentation Slides & Outline)~~
~~ONOW Worksheets, Post Service Form & PRAISE~~
~~VAS (Printing out of linomat)~~
~~HTI Journal + Pictures~~
GC - Typography assignment (Need illustrator)
BDC - 2 more exercises for workbook, few more sketches for Sketchbook
FDS - Tessellations
- Portfolio

Yay! Completed most of my assignments already! After this week, no more stressing out over BDC as I'll be done with it and submission is NEXT WEEK! YAY!

P.S: More time to rest and relax after assignments are done! :D

11:57 AM

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I won't be schooling from tomorrow all the way till next week. LOA.

How am I supposed to do or even finish up my assignments without any guidance from the lecturers? And moreover, I can't access the Blackboard at all on this new laptop. So how am I supposed to engage in e-learning when I can't even access the Blackboard??

P.S: Shiat.

7:22 PM

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Did I do anything wrong? Did I say something offensive? Or was your cell confiscated again? I have no idea why but when you didn't reply to my text yesterday, I thought you were already asleep although it was still early in the night. But when you didn't reply to my text again this morning, I was worried. Worried that you're pissed with me for something I did. But it can't be right? Just only last Sunday, we were hanging out together and laughing our asses off at every stupid little thing and sharing our secrets and stuff. Yesterday we even went to school together and again joked around as usual.

P.S: Confused.

12:37 PM

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Hello world!

School today was pretty much alright. Woke up early in the morning and headed to school early to meet Hannah and Qom to finish up our FDS assignment. Or rather Hannah did all the work. Kudos Hannah! Thanks a million!

Ontography is getting more and more complicated and intense by the day. It used to be a case of the uglier the drawing, the better but right now, we're moving on to tessallation.

Anyways, I miss my younger brother, Adek Khairil. Its random but I suddenly felt this way. Hope to see you soon bro.

P.S: I have to pull myself together

10:17 PM

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I can't believe that it's the first ever weekend that I actually became a good boy and stayed at home and didn't go out...Technically no anyway. But hey! Hanging out at the void decks near my place with my brothers isn't exactly counted as going out ok?! It's...Relaxation...Jyeah. Ok fine. Its bullshiaat I know. LMFAO.

Anyways, jyeah. So I actually managed to sit my ass down and get my school work accomplished....For the most part. Lets see...

BDC : 8 exercises to go
10 Pages to fill in for sketchbook

OC: Powerpoint slides

That's it! Ok. I wanna go shower now. Haven't showered since morning. Buh bye lovelies!

P.S: I'ma goooooooood boy. Yes I am. :D

3:19 PM

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There's always gonna be another mountain
I'm always gonna wanna make it move
Always gonna be an uphill battle
But sometimes I'm gonna have to lose
Ain't about how fast I get there
Ain't about what's waiting on the other side
It's the climb

P.S: These lyrics are meaningful.

11:37 PM

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Heyho! Guess what peeps?

I JUST GOT A BRAND NEW ACER ASPIRE LAPTOP! WOOTS!!!!! YAY!!!!

P.S: XD

6:10 PM

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Today I started off on a wrong foot. Why? Cuz SMRT's train services are damn fucked up.

SMRT: If all of your fucking trains are experiencing all those technical faults, send the whole lot of them for repairs or servicing or scrape it. I DON'T CARE! YOU MADE US WAIT FOR LIKE 6 CONSECUTIVE TRAINS BEFORE THE ONE THAT WAS WORKING FINALLY CAME! JUST DON'T DRIVE THEM AND EXPECT THEM TO RUN THE WHOLE ENTIRE MOTHERFUCKING SHIFT EVEN THOUGH THEY HAVE TECHNICAL FAULTS AND CAUSE US PASSENGERS TO BE SHOOED OUT OF THE TRAINS AND NOT ALLOWED TO BOARD THE NEXT FEW TRAINS THAT DROPPED BY, THUS CAUSING US GREAT INCONVENIENCE!! God! You guys are a bunch of doddery old fools you know that! Urgh! Stupid arses!

My laptop gave me fucked up problems again in school today cuz it constantly kept on crashing more than like 10 times each and every single time I tried to start up the internet in school. Stupid cibai!

Guess what cheered me up people? VAS! That's right! Why? Cuz my hard work and my efforts, with a lil bit of help from Sam and Hannah, actually paid off! It's just a test piece but God! I so love it cuz it looks so retro!

Dad, I don't get it. Urgh. You know what? Nevermind. What I'm about to say is extremely personal and only 2 people know. So I'll just save it.

P.S: I wish Mom were here. Things would be different then.

8:47 PM

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Hey3. What's up yaw? Guess what? I bought a brand new external hard drive!! JYEAH! However, the sad thing is my lappy keeps on crashing each and every single time I try to access my C drive folder.

Eww. I'm engaging in nerdy talk. Fast forward please!

So today I FINALLY managed to hang out with my besty, Tun. Both of us went down to Tampines to meet Farhan and hang out with him for a while before proceeding to Giant to get my external hard drive. Dropped by Adek Khairil's place to meet him and get the chalet money from him and headed down to Adek Afiq's tuition centre to fetch him back from tuition.

Now, I'm just chilling out, watching television while blogging and messing around with my brand new hard drive.

P.S: Weekends feel so good when you've done your assignments. :D

9:05 PM

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Its only fair enough to say that people tend to be judgemental and have their own qualms at first. Apparently, some lame ass emo-SHIT loser just loves it when our attendance was marked as absent simply because we came into class late. Why? Because he would love to see us expelled.

Guess what honey? We're not gonna be expelled. Matter of fact is, we're here to stay whether you like it or no so just pack up your shit and mind your own sickening god damn business. Oh and stay away from me darling cuz I don't want some cranked up, pathetic excuse for an emo-SHIT dog salivating or contaminating me with his 'I'm DESTINATED(supposed to be DESTINED but that fag spelt it out in this manner) to be alone' or 'Man, this sucks. Always left out. Life sucks' or 'When can you live without loneliness'. Eww! This is a typical yet very good example of fags who prioritise their BGRs more than friends to the extend that when they are single, they think that their life is in ruins and they deserve to die and that they are lonely when they've got so many people out there who are looking out for them. Urgh! Get a life betch! It's no wonder you're still single. With that emo-SHIT demeanor and rotten negative aspects of life that you have, girls obviously CAN'T stand the mere sight of you, let alone be in a relationship with you. :)

Yeah. I admit. I'm being a bitch right now and hell! I AM ONE actually but truth is, I was perfectly fine with you till yesterday after they told me what you did. You know what? No amount of words can actually express what I would LOVE to do to you one of these days. :D

As for those sickening MATREPS in SP, if you wanna hurl vulgarities at me, do it STRAIGHT TO MY FACE sugar. Don't wait till you guys walk past me and my back is turned then you start spewing out all those profanities but when you guys are like IN FRONT of me, the whole lot of you just zipped your mouths shut and don't even dare to utter a single word. What? Call yourselves a bunch of GUYS but apparently, you don't have the BALLS to screw me in my face?! Haha! Puh-lease. Tell you guys what. Why don't you just chop off your balls, go for a sex change surgery and fix in a pussy and 2 huge boobies instead? Apparently, you don't deserve to call yourselves GUYS cuz firstly, when you guys are alone and I walk past you, you don't even dare utter a single swear word out and secondly, when you guys are in a large group and my back is turned then all those swear words are thrown out. I have no respect for these kinda cowardly jerks. You want me to R-E-S-P-E-C-T you? F me up IN MY FACE and you deserve my respect. Otherwise, you just resemble the most disgusting despicable foul creature that ever walked the face of this earth.

Man! That's the second time in a space of a few short minutes that you sissies did that. Third strike and I'm all out man. I would so love to give you fags a piece of my mind. Does it matter if I'm alone or with my usual group of pals? NO! I was brought up to stand up and fight back for my rights and to NEVER EVER BE AFRAID if I'm NOT in the wrong. In this case, I don't even know who you are nor do I even care and I didn't even look at your shitty faces, let alone talk to you guys and yet, you're effing me up for NO APPARENT REASON just cuz you've got no lives of your own and you LOVE to intefere and look after other people's lives when the sad reality is, YOU CAN'T EVEN HANDLE YOUR OWN GOD DAMN LIFE! Fucking MATREPS. Or should I say. COWARDLY WANNABES!

P.S: Try effing me in my face. You'll get respect from me that way. :D

1:03 PM

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There's nothing much to blog on today.

School wise, it was ok. For the first time ever, the 4 of us actually griited our teeth and concentrated on our current VAS assignment during VAS just now and wow! It was actually kinda fun! That's a first!

BDC was ok. We're moving on to anatomy drawings. Did a front view drawing of Sam and side view drawing of Rina but both my drawings look more like a GUY than them. Sheesh. But at least, I'm able to draw the faces. :D

First week of Term 2 was a blast. Yeah! It feels great when you complete your assignments on time and don't procastinate. Gives you more time and freedom to do everythingelse!

Ridzwan, please reply bro. I need to know if you're going for the chalet or no cuz we have to pay the money to Bob by this coming Tues.

P.S: 1 week down. 7 weeks to go.

11:38 PM

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From today onwards, I make a promise to myself. What is it?

DON'T SKIP CLASSES AGAIN.

I realised that I haven't been putting in much effort in Term 1, hence my poor workmanship. This term, they have upped their expectations from us design students. Not only are they looking for workmanship and neatness, they are also looking for QUALITY.

If I were to skip classes again, I would miss out on a lot of shit and have less time to finish up my assignments.

I really wanna make it through Common Foundation and I don't wanna repeat any modules.

P.S: God, please give me the strength.

9:08 PM

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Yesterday, we ended class like 2 hours earlier. So our clique went down to Bras Basah to get our VAS materials at Straits ART.

*Louis, it's Straits ART, NOT Straits COMMERCIAL. And the ink cost $13, NOT $5 and the rollers cost $9, NOT $2. Fuck you. I hate you enough for always criticising even the most perfect art work just cuz you think you're a perfect lecturer when truth is, all you do is just TALK but you DON'T DO ANYTHING. Face up to reality bro. You suck. Almost everyone in all the Design Classes hates you. :)*

Went down to Zam Zam to eat MURTABAK for dinner, which was treated by Hanah. Thanks doll! Proceeded to Mosi Cafe for sheesha-ing, treated by Rina this time round. Thanks yaw! We played Poker Dare or Double Dare, which turned out to be boring cuz it wasn't as hardcore as it usually was.

Anyways, I'm currently like suffering from BOREDOM in my HTI Lecture. Urgh!

Damn it! I miss you bro! I miss you besty! I miss you lepak-ers! :D

P.S: Stoned

11:43 AM